The Village Idiot
Lady Boy
15 Oct 2006 - by Torquil Sprunt (posted under General)
Warnings of high levels of female hormones found in some beers unheeded by local man
A local man is today wishing he'd heeded government warnings regarding the unusual levels of female hormones (Oestrogen) found in some beers, most commonly lagers.
The man first began to become concerned when he started to experience difficulties in parallel parking, but just dismissed this as having one too many beers the previous night. However, as time went on, other symptoms began to appear. "I noticed that I'd started growing breasts" he commented "but things went really wrong when I went on holiday and suddenly noticed that I didn't have a winky any more. I've never had a big one" he said "so I guess I won't miss it too much, but it's still a concern".
A senior government scientist, Dr. Egon Spengler, said "We can not overstate the potential dangers that this discovery poses to young men. We would urge people to drink real beer instead. Continuing to drink large quantities of these lagers may turn our generation of lager louts into lager ladies.
The local man, who wishes to remain anonymous, is said to be distraught and is presently being comforted by his close family.
You have been warned!
Torqil Sprunt
The man first began to become concerned when he started to experience difficulties in parallel parking, but just dismissed this as having one too many beers the previous night. However, as time went on, other symptoms began to appear. "I noticed that I'd started growing breasts" he commented "but things went really wrong when I went on holiday and suddenly noticed that I didn't have a winky any more. I've never had a big one" he said "so I guess I won't miss it too much, but it's still a concern".
A senior government scientist, Dr. Egon Spengler, said "We can not overstate the potential dangers that this discovery poses to young men. We would urge people to drink real beer instead. Continuing to drink large quantities of these lagers may turn our generation of lager louts into lager ladies.
The local man, who wishes to remain anonymous, is said to be distraught and is presently being comforted by his close family.
You have been warned!
Torqil Sprunt
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